Why is there always drama?

You know, I am really getting tired of having some sort of drama everywhere I go. Do I just scream, "Hello, here I am!! Follow me please!! I need to have something going on in my life to keep me stressed out!!" Truly, I am getting so tired of it. I am starting to wonder if my life will ever be free of these particular stresses that are not necessary in life. Why can my life not just have the same stresses that normal people have day to day? Iam really curious. And it always seems like I get the rotten end of the stick. I'm so very tired of it. Honestly, if ever there was a time in my life that I needed to get rid of all of it, the time is now. And I am sincerely trying. I have tried to throw out those friendships which are not healthy for me and my relationships with my family. Started working to try and gain a little more self respect and esteem for myself and help with the financial stresses that seem to plague everyone these days. But even then, some sort of drama and issue seems to follow me. It saddens me and makes me so frustrated. Does it ever end? I hope that someday, I can find something that makes me truly happy and is easy to do.

Now on another note, a much happier one, Chase will be celebrating his first birthday tomorrow!! I am so excited for him. I can't believe how quickly this year has gone. They seem to go by faster and faster. So we will be celebrating our last "first" birthday tomorrow. Hopefully Mom and Dad will be able to make it in to celebrate in the festivities with us. I am sure they will though as they always tend to be able to make it. It's so exciting and I look forward to the traditional cake!! It's going to be great. Pics will follow the party!!

All the best!!

Work, work, work

Well since last post I have taken up a job at the gym that I go to. I accepted the night Customer Service Rep job and work 9PM to 5AM. Tough shift, but all in all not too bad. Night 2 came and went without too much incident. My internet seemed to have crashed somewhere around 1 or 2 AM and no matter what I did I could not figure out what the problem was. I went all over the place trying to see if there was something unplugged or something of that sort. Unfortunately I could find nothing wrong. So I finally gave in and just waited until someone came in for the morning shift. Even they couldn't figure out what the issue was. So looks like I am not the only one confused. But it looks like I am on my own now because the regular night person just had his last shift with me tonight and is now off to his new job. I am fine with it. It is so strange sometimes being the ONLY person in that great big place. Music as loud as I want and playing what I want to hear. Being able to read a book is really quite fun too. It amazes me how quickly the body and mind can adjust to time changes. It's 630 in the morning and normally I am still really tired from lack of sleep from the previous night, but with me not having been to bed yet, I am just winding down. Hoping to get Jr out of bed here right away and going to the dayhome. Chase is already up and dressed. But he is the early riser of the family. I must admit, spending so much time away from my kids is a little strange to me. I have not spent this much time away from them ever. I miss them quite a bit, but I would not be the first Mom to have had to go to work. Rob has taken on the night responsibility with Chase and has not complained about it which makes me happy. I am thrilled that he can hear him at night and am grateful to him for the help he has extended so that I can work and help pull my part in supporting this family that he has worked so hard to provide for in the past 6 years. I only hope that my little paycheck can help to lighten his load a little bit. He is so stressed out these days but I do sincerely love him for trying to not complain about it. Things have been tough but we are trying to come together to figure them out. Hopefully he doesn't have to continue to work the entire weekends through so that we do have at least some time to spend with one another. Anyways, time to go get Jr up and at 'em. Take care and I'll write again soon!!

A new thing that I truly love.

So in my quest for weight loss, I have been looking for alternatives to things that I just simply feel I cannot live without. One thing in particular, spaghetti. I adore spaghetti and crave it a couple of times a month. Noodles alone will kill the any chance of loosing anything. LOL. So I figured that I would try spaghetti squash (which I have on many occasions) I have had a few meals consisting of the sweet and slightly crisp gord. But last night I sat there while my family ate spaghetti with regular noodles and me with my squash and realized exactly how wonderful it felt to go back for a second helping and not feel over full and best of all, not guilty!! I figured that it was time to start eating that more often when I want spaghetti as it is a very safe choice for a food that I love.

And cantaloupe. I have always enjoyed it but never sat down and taken the time to truly enjoy it. It is a pretty amazing fruit. But I tend to be the only person in my house that eats it for some strange reason. It is one of Rob's faves but he still would much prefer to sit down with a bag of chips. Boy is that tough for me. It is so unbelievably tough to change the one that one eats. Especially when you are the only person in the house who has a desire to do it. People complain about gaining weight in this house but then sit down with ALL the wrong foods. And it's so strange how the right foods are the most expensive ones. It's no wonder it is so difficult to want to change what we eat. It's frustrating is what it is.

But here I sit, only complaining about it. I can't ask the other people in my home to change their eating habits. They are going to have to want to do it on their own. Mind you with Rob's help, I have had to not make 2 differnt meals every day. Sometimes if I make something that I know Jr won't eat at all I will make him a little something different. But Rob has gotten a little more strict with him and he has been sitting with us and eating the meals that I make. That makes me happy. So I will keep updating about my venture. Which isn't easy as we all know.

Happy Spring everyone.

Nearly Spring

Well, it has been far too long since I last wrote. I am really bad at this whole blogging thing. I wish I was better at it, but sadly, all I cna do it try and improve myself in this area. So much has happened since I last wrote.

Chase is nearly 9 months old now. The time has flown by so fast. It seems like the more kids you have the faster the time goes for us as parents watching them grow. He crawls and still has no teeth, but I am satisfied that he will have strong healthy teeth. He babbles on and on in his baby talk and Rob and I just love it. He has such an amazing curious little personality. He's really getting fun. It's amazing how Chase and JR differ. The two of them are completly different. It is hard to believe they came from the same parents. But Chase is really a good baby. Just doesn't sleep as well as he probably could and eats ALL the time.

JR is doing great. His speech has really come along well. The school team at his school are hoping to try and refer him to a full time kindergarten class that is specialized for children with speech issues as he is still not exactly up to speed on that. But they are continuing to work hard with him as are we at home. He is almost 5 and turning into a little man already. He is so independant and has an imagination the size of Texas. It's really fun to watch. He enjoys school and I hope that he continues to enjoy it.

Rob has started a job in an office here. It's a marketing company that supplies the wholesalers and contractors in various plumbing products. He is enjoying it for the most part. It has been a really hard adjustment going from the tools to an office job and working weekends for extra spending money. He works a lot. But he likes money so it's worth it in the end. LOL. He had a nice long vacation a couple weeks back. Drove down to Arizona to visit Ron and Louise and do some 4x4ing and really enjoyed it. It was really what he needed although that man doesn't know how to slow down or relax. So even on vacation it was always go, go, go!! I think I physically spoke with him on the phone for maybe an hour in total in 13 days. So he was constantly on the move or in the desert somewhere. He also spent 2 days in Vegas and that was when he decided that that would be the place he wants to take me first. Then we can hold off on Mexico or someplace hot until the boys are both old enough to get shipped off for a longer period of time.

As for me, nothing much changes for me. I signed up to walk 60 kms in the summer for the Weekend to End Women's Cancers. I am really looking forward to it. It is going to be an incredibly hard thing to do but so rewarding. It is still far more easier to walk 60k than to fight breast or cervical cancer. I am very excited to be part of making a difference in this field. I also signed up to a brand new gym that is opening this week. And also looking forward to making a difference in my life and my health. I have a bit of weight to loose and am anxious and excited to do so.

So all in all, life in the Souster home is going well and we are all happy and healthy. Excited for summer to come and do some camping.